Tuesday, January 02, 2007

New Year's Wish List

I was mulling over resolutions and whatnots when I read PJ's post. Rather than doing resolutions, she made a wish list. In other words, she listed the resolutions she wished other people would make. Brilliant! So I'm doing the same.

1. I wish we had new carpeting in our house.

2. I wish the snow on our street would melt, as the city decided ours was not an important enough street to plow.

3. I wish people would chill the hell out when they're behind the wheel and stop driving like douche bags. What is it about automobiles that makes so many people believe that they're invincible? Slow down, give some room between you and the person in front of you, pay attention to the road and the other drivers, and we'll all get to where we're going without incident.

4. I wish people still fought with fists, knives, chains and pipes instead of guns.

5. I wish they still taught things like American history and social studies in public schools. Standardized testing has ruined the concept of well-rounded educations. Now it's all about math and English, math and English. My 7th-grade daughter didn't know who Gerald Ford was, and unless my wife and I teach her she'll never know because they don't study American history past the Revolutionary War in middle school anymore.

6. I wish Charlie Kaufman would hurry up and write another movie.

7. I wish I'd hurry up and finish the movie I'm writing.

8. I wish everything was less expensive.

9. I wish I could get into shape by drinking beer and eating pretzels, like I could when I was 21.

10. I wish all of you a happy, healthy and prosperous 2007.


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